The Full Moon's Request
by Demented Vampiric Zombie
Summary: Tonks wants something from Remus, and he doesn't want her to have it. Inspired by the song Birdie by Vanessa Carlton. NOT A SONG-FIC! Rated because of paranoia. Not DH compliant.
1. The Question

**Disclaimer: If I was the actual author of Harry Potter, I would NOT be putting my stories on any website with the word fan in the name...**

"Remus," Tonks said lovingly, walking into the room where her husband was reading the Daily Prophet and drinking his coffee, "

"Remus," Tonks said lovingly, walking into the room where her husband was reading the _Daily Prophet_ and drinking his coffee, "I've got a request."

"Is it the same request that you've been asking of me for a month?" she said irritably. Full moon was that night and he wasn't feeling well.

"Maybe," Tonks said innocently.

"Forget about it!"

"Remus--!"

"You know how I feel about this! I will not doom you to a life of pain and suffering!" he interrupted her, putting down the newspaper.

"But--!"

"No! I will not bite you tonight! Forget about it, it won't happen! I care about you too much to do it!" he said, his voice raising just a bit.

"And I care about you too much to give up!" she pleaded.

"Tonks--" he yelled, then he took a deep breath and calmed himself. "Tonks, you have no idea the pain I suffer, I will _not_ make you suffer the same. It's against everything I believe."

"But I want to know, Remus. I don't want you to suffer alone," she said sadly before bending down and gently kissing him on the cheek.

"Why did I have to marry the most bloody stubborn woman on the planet?" Remus said, looking up at the ceiling.

"Because we were made for each other," she said, wrapping her arms around him from behind.

"Which means that you don't need to change to be my soul mate," he said.

"You weren't made like this," she said, "we'd still be a perfect match if you weren't."

"But you still aren't and I want to keep it that way!"

"I don't mind suffering a bit to help ease your pain!"

"Alright, let's just say, for the sake of the argument, that I agreed to do it," he said, his wife sitting down on the other side of the table. "How could I do it without seriously injuring you?"

"You've taken you potion today, haven't you?" Tonks asked.

"Yes."

"All you need to do is nip at my leg or something," she explained rationally. "Just deep enough for me to bleed."

He looked at the table for a moment, trying to figure out a flaw in her plan.

"What if I accidentally bit to deep?"

"Are you serious? You're you, need I go on?"

Remus laughed quietly.

"I have to agree with you there," he said quietly.

There was a brief silence where he sat and thought things through.

"You have really given this quite a bit of thought, haven't you?" he said finally.

"I wouldn't take something like this lightly," she whispered, taking his hand gently into her own. "I may be clumsy, but I' not stupid. I've been thinking about it for months."

"I know you're not stupid, I just really think this is a bad idea."

"I'm completely willing; I just need your help. I know it hurts, but I don't care! I know that it can't be fixed, that it'll make me what you call a monster, but I really don't care, Remus!"

There was a long pause during which Remus stared at the floor, absentmindedly stroking Tonks's hand with his thumb and Tonks just stared at him hopefully.

"Alright," he said slowly, his voice sounding suddenly scratchy. "But you have to promise me three things. One, you will never, ever tell anyone about this; if they figure it out on their own, that's fine, but if not, don't tell them." She nodded, a huge smile appearing on her face. "Two, you must never complain about it, it will only make me feel bad about my choice and I know you don't want that. And three, you must never contaminate anyone else."

"Of course, I'll do anything!" Tonks said gleefully, standing up and hugging him on the neck. "Thank you so much!"

"You're welcome," he said, his face showing no trace of happiness.

**A/N**

**Not many people have ever heard the song Birdie (as far as I can tell she only ever sang it once, and that was live in a pub just after she recorded the album Rinse, which was never released) so I thought I would post the lyrics as well:**

**_I'm wrapped in the arms of a broken man  
And he asks "are you ready?  
'cuz I'll take you as far as I can  
If you would just let me  
Don't you think that I should hold you?  
Don't you think that's what I should do?''  
So I'm wrapped in the arms of a broken man  
But he'll never have me_**

I've been thrown to wonder worlds  
See if I fit and flow, just watch me swirl  
And if I think you'd crush me  
You say "Don't worry, baby  
ah, oh, oh my pretty"

I'm kept in a way  
'cuz I'm just a bird in a cage with a rage  
And he can't run away  
'cuz I am the girl that he can't save

I'll never know how the moon sits so still, no  
I'll never know how the moon sits so still

I've been thrown to wonder worlds  
See if I fit and flow, just watch me swirl  
And if I think you'd crush me  
You say "Don't worry, baby  
ah, oh, oh, my pretty"

Braid me, mold me, I'm just your doll, now scold me  
Break me, bruise me, oh, wear me out then soothe me  
And love me! love me! love me!  
love me! oh, no, no, no, no, no  
I've been thrown to wonder worlds  
See if I fit and flow, just watch me swirl  
And if I think you crush me  
You say "Don't worry, baby, don't worry  
I've been thrown to wonder worlds  
See if I fit and flow just watch me swirl  
Around you and you say "Don't worry, my...  
My pretty"  
oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. **It's easy to where I got Remus from in there...****Review!**


	2. Bitten

**Disclaimer: If I was the actual author of Harry Potter, I would NOT be putting my stories on any website with the word fan in the name...**

* * *

"It's going to hurt more than you think," Remus said as the sunset was approaching

"It's going to hurt more than you think," Remus said as the sunset was approaching. "Werewolf bites hurt more than normal wounds, and I'm going to have to bite down slowly or I could bite to deep. You're okay with that, aren't you?"

"Yes, Remus, you can take your bloody time for all I care, it doesn't matter," she said reassuringly. They had been talking about this all day long.

"And you won't transform until the next full moon," he added.

"I know. I've done the research."

Just as she was saying this, the sun began to sink down below the horizon. Remus fell over, off of his chair and began screaming. His body began morphing until the man on the floor screaming became an animal on the floor howling.

"Are you alright?!" Tonks said quickly, walking over to the man (or wolf) that she loved, who whimpered in reply. "It can wait until later, if you'd like."

The wolf nodded his head as if to say that he wanted to rest first.

An hour later, he walked back over to his wife and gently pushed her hand with his nose.

"Ready to do this?"

Almost shamefully, the wolf nodded his head in confirmation.

Tonks sat down on the floor and pulled up her pant leg to show her calf.

"I'm sorry if I scream, but don't stop if I do," she said, putting her hands behind her to support herself.

Imediately the wolf latched onto her leg and began biting down with razor sharp teeth she began quietly grunting in pain, trying her best not to cry out. Just as he broke the skin, she let out a quick shriek.

Moments later, Remus came back with some gauze and ointment in his mouth. He dropped them by Tonks's leg.

"Thanks, Remus," she said, beginning to dab the ointment on her leg. "That wasn't as bad as I thought it would be."

After she finished treating and bandaging the wound, Tonks turned to the animal that was her husband and said, "I'm sorry I made you do that, but it'll help you in the end."

* * *

**A/N**

**I'm trying to decide if I should add a third chapter to show what happens when Tonks transforms for the first time. If I get enough reviews asking me to, I will.**


	3. The Morning After

**Disclaimer: If I was the actual author of Harry Potter, I would NOT be putting my stories on any website with the word fan in the name...**

* * *

The next morning, Remus woke his wife from her slightly agitated slumber with a home-cooked breakfast-in-bed, wearing his, all too familiar _I should not have done that, why did I let you talk me into it _frown. The same frown he wore after he agreed to go out with her, and after he'd kissed her for the first time, and after they'd been married. But this time, unlike all the others, he really meant it, and there was totally convinced that he had done the wrong thing. Even after almost a year of marriage, he still couldn't hold out when she really wanted something, and she knew it. He had never regretted doing anything more than he did now.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, his slightly hoarse yet gentle voice full of worry and concern.

"Great," she groaned sleepily, sitting herself up to lean back against the headboard as he placed the tray with the plate on her lap. "Ooh, waffles, my favorite!" she exclaimed before leaning over to kiss him. "But you didn't have to do this you know, especially not just after transformation. Come," she scooted over and patted a spot beside her on the bed, "sit. I know you must be tired. Did you get any sleep at all last night?"

"No," he said, attempting to smile, though it turned out more like a grimace. "But I'm not too tired, adrenalin has kicked in by now. I am a bit sore, though," he said with a finality in his voice that told his wife not to continue pestering him about any sort of 'feeling', whether it be physical or otherwise. He didn't want to have to lie to her, but he outright refused to say that his aching muscles were nothing compared to his incredible sense of guilt at having given in to her almost juvenile wish.

"I'm sorry," Tonks said, her mouth full of waffle. She swallowed, then added, "Is there anything I can do?"

"Why do you always ask that when you know that the answer is, and will always be, no?" he said as he sat down beside her.

"Because I care. And because I hope that, one day, you will have found something that I can do that actually _does_," he wondered how she could emphasize the word so greatly through another mouth full of waffle without spitting it all over the place, "help."

"I thank you for caring," he said. The _I should not have done that_ frown returned to his face when he said, "But I remind you, that starting next month, you will be having the same pains as I."

"I told you that I didn't just come up with a cockamamie scheme to do this a month ago, I did my research. You know as well as I that you're going to suffer more greatly than me, even now," she said, before swallowing and stuffing her mouth full of more waffle.

"I can't even make you think any less about my suffering and more about your own…I tell you, I have never hated books more than I do at this very moment," he said, a shadow of a grin appearing on his face before the same expression overtook it again. "So you know the main agony of transformation is the pain of the bite coming back like it was when you first got it?"

"Yes," she said, just after swallowing, looking him in the eye rather than getting another bite on her fork. "And I know that I really expected it to hurt much worse than it did when you bit me, and that Greyback nearly killed you. I'm fairly sure a little nip on my leg won't be anywhere near as painful as a full-on attack on my body." She paused, then looked down at the bed. "Tell you the truth, I started crying when first I read that. I knew it was hard on you, Remus, but I didn't know it was _that_ painful. I was just happy I wasn't thrown out of the library, I was causing such a disturbance."

Remus put a comforting arm around his wife's shoulders and pulled her closer to him in a sort of parallel hug. He was alarmed to notice the tears dripping onto a pillow, at which she was staring, at the thought of his suffering. He pondered his actions a moment before responding.

"I'm not going to say that I've gotten used to it, because that would be a downright lie, but I will say that I've learned to live with it," he said thoughtfully, putting his free hand on her chin and guiding her face toward his before wiping the tears from her face. "It's a fact of life that I just happen to despise. I happen to know of at least one such fact exists for you, as well," he said, trying to get the focus away from himself. "And, oddly enough, this fact, like mine, happens every twenty-eight days."

Tonks was happy she hadn't taken another bite yet, because she feared she would've choked if there had been anything in her mouth. She had laughed a loud laugh, which was probably a bit extreme for the size of the comment made, but neither of them cared, really. They were just happy something had lightened the mood, even just a bit. Remus hadn't smiled at the comment he had made though, he had smiled because he loved his wife's laugh.

"Did you just compare lycanthropy with having a menstrual cycle?" she snorted.

"Think about it," he said, still smiling. "They both hurt, they both cause blood, they both entail moodiness just before, and they both happen monthly. I can't tell you how many times my friends said that I had PMS…they just said it stood for Pre-Moon Syndrome."

Tonks laughed again.

"I never thought about it like that, but you're right," she said, smiling again. She took another bite of the waffle before saying, "You are the best cook I have ever met, have I ever told you that?"

"Only a thousand times," he said quietly. "And I'm not exaggerating , I've counted."

She giggled and kissed him on the nose.

"I'm glad to see that you're still your normal self, despite the shooting pain in your leg that I know must be killing you," he said once the moment was over, frown in place once more. "I'm really sorry about that."

"I know you are," she said. "And I won't lie, it does twinge a bit, but I really did expect it to be worse, and it's still less painful than I had expected. I mean, you barely broke the skin, and even if it did hurt as badly as I'd thought, I am an Auror who was also a member of the Order of the Phoenix, mind, I was injured much more severely in battle, not to mention that I've been subjected to a wide variety of curses. I know that you know that I'm no stranger to the Cruciatus Curse," she shuddered slightly, "and no injury can compare to that. Not even the _worst_ werewolf bite."

"I'll have to say that you're right. Cruciatus is much worse than any injury. Would you mind if I took a look at it?" he asked, being careful to make his voice sound more kind and less reluctant, as he knew changing the dressings would likely make the wound hurt like it had when it had first been inflicted. "I need to know how badly I hurt you, so I know how big of a sorry present I should buy you."

"You can look at it, and change the dressings, too, because I didn't sleep that great so they need it; but, what you _can't_ do is go out and buy me an 'I'm sorry' present for something I damn near forced you to do," she said firmly.

Remus nodded, though both of them knew that he was going to buy her something anyway. And whatever it was, it would be expensive. His apology breaking her favorite coffee mug had been a thousand pound couch, and that had been fixed with a simple Repairing Charm. It turns out, that while he may have been poor in the Wizarding world, his mother, who had been a Muggle herself, had left him a large sum of Muggle of money that he refused to cash in for Galleons as a sort of memorial after she had died. He refused to spend it unless it was for a cause much more worthy than he was himself.

Carefully, Remus moved the sheet off of his wife's lower half and gingerly began unwrapping the gauze from her leg, doing his best not to hurt her as he went. He had done quite well until he reached the center of the bottom portion of the injury, which was the shallowest part of it. It seemed the blood had coagulated and had begun to form a scab, which was intertwined with the gauze that had been pressed against it.

"Oh dear," he said quietly.

"What is it?" she asked worriedly, through even more half-chewed waffle.

"It's nothing too serious, it's just that it seems to be fairly well attached to the gauze, here," he said, turning his head away from her leg and toward her face. "I'm afraid there's no way of pulling this off without it hurting and starting to bleed again."

"Shit!" exclaimed Tonks miserably. "Are you going to need both hands to get it off?"

"I am if you want me to try not to pull off any skin with it," he replied, knowing full well that she didn't care one bit.

"You could tear my bloody leg off for all I care, as long as I can hold your hand while you do it," she said, finishing her breakfast and putting the tray off to the side. "That was the worst part about last night, you know. That you had paws instead of hands for me to squeeze, and it wouldn't feel right to squeeze a paw, even when I knew it was yours."

"Thanks for the kind thought, but right now, can we focus on this?" he asked, extending his hand toward hers.

"Do it fast," she said as she grasped his hand with a grip that was already painfully tight.

Remus took a firm hold of the gauze that was adhering to his beloved wife's wound, and as rapidly and painlessly as he could jerked it up and off of it.

Tonks struggled to keep her face impassive and her vocal cords still as pain shot through her leg once more. Though she did succeed in doing that, she didn't even attempt to refrain from squeezing her husband's hand so tightly that they were both amazed that she didn't break any of his fingers.

"You alright?" he asked, shaking his hand to undo the lingering pain of it being so compressed.

"I think I might be better than you, at the moment," she said matter-of-factly, eyeing his hand and visually checking to see if she had caused it some sort of injury.

"Your leg says otherwise," he said, noticing that there was a drop blood running down her leg. He quickly began blotting it up and putting light pressure on it with a gauze swab.

"I'm _fine_, Remus," she said emphatically.

Remus checked to see if the wound had stopped bleeding yet, and it had. He began examining it, starting with the part he had made with his lower jaw. She had been, right, he had barely broken the skin, or, at least, in some places he had. But the places where his canine teeth had been were quite a bit deeper; almost half a centimeter in for the one on the top right.

"Did it hurt too badly?" he asked.

"Not as bad as I had expected," she replied.

"That doesn't answer my question, though," he said, knowing his wife, and her ability to lie by telling the truth. "I asked whether it hurt too badly, not if it hurt as bad as you had expected."

"Well, I'll just say that it definitely wasn't the most pleasant thing I'd ever experienced."

Remus mentally kicked himself for being so considerate. He wished he hadn't asked that question, he knew that by "not pleasant" she meant "bordering on agony" and he hated himself for asking how badly he, _he_, had hurt her, the love of his life, who he only reluctantly admitted he deserved.

"Do you mind if I make a confession to you?" he asked in a voice that was barely louder than a whisper as he began dabbing a green-tinted ointment on her leg.

"Go right ahead," she said, succeeding in an attempt to stop the fact that the ointment was burning like hell from showing in her voice.

"You promise you won't hate me?" he asked, placing a non-stick gauze pad over both parts of the wound and starting to wrap gauze around them.

"Remus John Lupin, I could never, ever hate you, and you know it!" she said, both affectionate and sarcastically insulted tones in her voice. "You are the best man alive!"

"Most of the Wizarding world would beg to differ," he said as he secured the gauze and looked her in the eyes. "And this is something that most women would definitely leave their husbands because of."

"Did you have an affair?" she asked, her voice turning angry very quickly.

"No, no, nothing like that," he said quickly. "But…" he paused, thinking, trying to figure out a good way to say this without sounding like a prat. "Last night," he said so quietly she had to strain to hear him, "w-when I b-bit you, I-I, well, I…" he stuttered and Tonks looked at him angrily. He started over. "Last night, when I bit you, I-I liked it," he said finally; tears of guilt from what he had done, what he had _enjoyed_, welled up in his eyes. "I liked the taste of your blood in my mouth, and the sensation of flesh between my teeth was almost pleasant. The—" he stopped talking, unable to stop the sobs, and collapsed against the side of the bed.

Without as much as a second thought, Tonks hopped down to the floor to comfort him, ignoring the pain in her leg. She pulled him into a tight embrace and began patting his back, comfortingly.

"You d-don't--hate m-me?" he asked, once he had stopped sobbing too hard to speak.

"I told you already, I could never hate you," she said gently. "And especially not for this. It was a simple instinct, whether it seemed like it at the time or not. Of course you would've liked it in your wolf form, even though you'd taken your potion, it's just a natural reaction. But I do see how you would've found it frightening, being the kind hearted, gentleman that you are."

"I'm just glad that I didn't bite down more, _instinctively_," he said, wiping the tears from his eyes, suddenly feeling rather silly for being a thirty-eight year-old man that was sitting on the floor, needing to be comforted by his twenty-five year-old wife.

"I am, too," she said bluntly. "But I'm not sure I would've been able to tell the difference, if you had."

He pulled himself out of the hug and looking at her.

"And I still don't want you to buy me anything," she said firmly.

* * *

**A/N**

**Never trust me when I say "I'll write something if"...and the same goes for "I'll write this next", because if a plot bunny pops into my head, I will write it, regardless of that I may have already said I would do. This chapter is proof of that.**

**I fixed it! I'm fully awake now and I've made a few minor changes to this chapter, and fixed the ending, which I now realize was absolutely unrealistic.**

**The waffles are not simbolic of talking too much, I was simply eating one when I wrote this so I used it.**

**I speak from personal experience when I say that scabs can form intertwined with gauze, for those of you who are lucky enough not to have needed to use gauze. In fourth grade I got a huge cut on my ankle from a scootering accident (don't ask) and I had to keep gauze on it for a week or two. For the first few days, every time I changed it I pulled part of the scab off and it started bleeding again.**

**Also, I've tried to keep the romance at a minimum because the last time I had a boyfriend I was...carry the one...three years old, so, needless to say that I'm not an expert in that area.**

**  
Review, please!**


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